I have been thinking about productivity again.
I haven't suddenly become interested in finding the perfect morning routine or working out how to squeeze another hour into my day. If anything, I’m becoming less interested in that.
What I’m interested in is what happens when being productive stops being simply something we do and starts becoming something we need.
There is a difference.
I think that difference sits underneath a question many of us eventually find ourselves asking: why do I always need to be busy? Even when there is nothing particularly urgent to do, it can be surprisingly difficult to leave the space empty.
I actually like being productive
I am a productive person. I like making things happen, having ideas and bringing them to life. I enjoy finishing something, ticking things off and knowing I’ve used my time well.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.
Sometimes when we talk about slowing down, there’s a danger that we make productivity itself the villain. As though the answer is to stop striving, abandon the to-do list and spend our lives sitting peacefully under a tree. That’s not what I mean by Slow Down to Speed Up.
For me, the more interesting question is:
Am I doing this because it matters, or because doing something makes me feel safer?
Because those two things can look remarkably similar from the outside.
I can always find something useful to do
Give me an empty afternoon and I can fill it.
There will always be another blog I could write, a page on the website I could improve, an idea I could develop, something I could organise or a bit of admin that has suddenly become terribly important.
The annoying thing is that most of those things are genuinely useful.
That makes this kind of productivity difficult to spot. I’m not wasting three hours doing something completely pointless and wondering where the day went. I can usually produce very convincing evidence that what I’m doing needs doing.
But useful and necessary are not quite the same thing. Neither are useful and chosen.
I’m beginning to notice that sometimes I create work because work gives me something very reassuring: a sense that I am doing something.
When productivity becomes armour
This is where my favourite question comes in:
What is this pattern protecting you from?
Sometimes activity protects us from uncertainty. If I’m doing something, I can tell myself I’m making progress.
It can also protect us from the uncomfortable feeling that we should be doing more. If being hardworking, capable or useful has become part of how we understand our value, an empty afternoon might not feel like freedom at all. It might feel vaguely irresponsible.
Then there is control. There are parts of life and business where I can do everything that is mine to do and still have absolutely no control over the result.
I can make an invitation, but I cannot make someone say yes. I can share an idea without knowing how it will be received. I can put myself forward for something and have no idea what will happen next...or, I can reorganise something.
I know which one gives me the quicker sense of achievement. That doesn’t make the organising pointless, but it does make me curious about why I’ve suddenly decided it needs doing now.
Purposeful work feels different
I don’t want to become less productive. I want to become more aware of what is driving my productivity.
Purposeful work has some kind of direction to it. I know why I’m doing it and, perhaps more importantly, I can usually recognise when I’ve done enough.
Protective productivity seems to have a moving finish line. There is always one more thing I could improve, another task I could complete, something else I could prepare for before I do the thing I’m actually nervous about doing. I could probably spend the rest of my working life getting ready.
And that is the distinction I’m becoming interested in. The action itself doesn't necessarily tell me whether I’m working purposefully or protectively. I could do exactly the same task on two different days, once because I’ve consciously chosen it and once because I’m trying to outrun the feeling that I should be doing more. Only I really know the difference, and sometimes I don’t know until I slow down long enough to ask.
Maybe slowing down was never really about doing less
This month I’ve been exploring one of my Self-Mastery Principles: Slow Down to Speed Up.
As September comes to an end, I think I understand that principle slightly differently.
It isn’t really about speed; it’s about creating enough space to notice what is driving me before I automatically respond to it.
When I slow down, I have a better chance of noticing when I’m filling space simply because space feels uncomfortable. I can catch myself choosing something safe and measurable instead of doing something bolder where I can’t guarantee the outcome.
And sometimes, having noticed all of that, I might still choose to work.
That matters. Self-Mastery isn’t about forcing ourselves to rest any more than it is about forcing ourselves to achieve. It’s about having access to the choice.
If productivity has become armour, I don't think we need to rip it off and declare that being busy is bad. Being capable, hardworking and useful may have served us incredibly well. It may still serve us well, and we can appreciate what our armour has done for us while also noticing when we no longer need it.
So perhaps that’s where I want to leave September, with an invitation to become curious about why you’re doing so much.
The next time you find yourself filling the space, adding another thing to the list or trying to prove you’ve used your time well, ask yourself:
Is this purposeful work, or am I using activity to feel safe, in control or worthy?
You don’t have to change the answer but if you can see what is driving you, you have something you didn’t have when you were simply responding automatically. You have a choice.
What might your productivity be protecting you from?
If you recognise yourself in this, productivity may be just one of the ways you protect yourself when something feels uncertain, uncomfortable or outside your control.
I created the Protective Strategies Quiz to help you notice some of the patterns you might reach for: from staying busy and overthinking to people-pleasing, perfectionism and doing everything yourself.
Because before you try to change the pattern, it helps to understand what it might be doing for you.